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Eleven Long Days

December 31, 2006

Eleven long days at home with my kids over the holidays – is it time to back to work yet?

 

"I don't want to be a mother anymore," I heard myself say as my children fought around me in the kitchen as I tried to unload the dishwasher.

 

I couldn't believe I said it out loud. I think it was in response to my six-year-old telling me she doesn't like me anymore after I had just spent a tedious afternoon helping her write an essay for school that involved an emergency trip to the store for Whiteout.

 

She decided she didn't like me, because I wouldn't allow her to have candy before dinner.

 

Luckily, my statement went right over the kids' head. Unfortunately, my husband heard it. It's just one more entry for his in-case-we-get-divorced journal.

 

"Your Honor, I swear she said she didn't want to be a mother anymore. I heard her," he would say in court.

 

He told me I was acting crazy and promptly walked out of the kitchen, leaving me with the two wild animals still chasing each other around my ankles.

 

I take off the week between Christmas and New Year's every year because school is closed. We used to travel to Philadelphia to visit my family, but for the past two years we've stayed here.

 

The long and short of it is that I keep checking the calendar to see how many more days I have left before I go back to work.

 

It's not that I don't love my kids. I do – to the moon and back. But – you knew there had to be a but – the constant whining, fighting, and sassiness is making me into a crazy woman.

 

I freely admit it. I'm definitely not cut out for this day-in and day-out.

 

Even the frantic pace and chaos of my work day does not compare to being held hostage in a house by two very short people with the ability to screech me into insanity.

 

My older daughter is actually excited about going back to school on Tuesday, but not as excited as I am.

 

I look forward to pantyhose, going to the bathroom by myself, eating something other than chicken nuggets, and generally having an independent thought that's not interrupted by a child's immediate need.

 

I've got to give stay-at-home moms credit, it's the toughest job there is and it's one that I'm not qualified for...

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